Sunday, February 13, 2011

Crayola Friends

In light of the new year, and often before that, I've been thinking a lot about the different types of friendships I have in my life. I've become more aware of who is a true friend. About 2 years ago, I had this conversation with a very old (not old in age) and wise friend of mine, and we determined that our friendships can be compared to crayons.

There are all different colors and variations, but they all end up making the box complete. Lately, I've realized there are a few color friendships in my life, that aren't necessarily the right ones for me. Not that I want to trade them for other colors, I just need to discontinue those colors.

I try really hard to be a nice person, and a good friend to those around me. I always try to put others first, and I always taken in to consideration how my thoughts, words and actions affect those around me. I have different kinds of friendships, friends from work, friends from work who have become more than just in the "work friend" category, and that I can count on when I need someone to talk too. Old friends, new friends, Mom Friends, my walking buddy, my volunteering friends, my cohorts, friends I go to for parenting and relationship advice, or just to complain to each other! and so many others. What I realize, is that I have apparently been trying to hard to "prove" my friendships, and be there for others, and I've noticed that some of these don't do the same for me. I realize that some people have been pretending to be my friend, or even just an acquaintance, but yet criticize me behind my back, and talk about things they really have no knowledge of. I've decided, that I will no longer give those people the time of day. I am cutting the ties to that negative energy, and if they still feel the need to judge because of my lifestyle, or my economic status, then so be it. I feel sorry for those people that feel the need to belittle others to feel better about themselves. I am happy with the person I am, the person I'm becoming, and the life I live. I may not have all the things some consider necessary to classify being a good person, or worth their time, but I have what makes me happy and that's all that matters.

Friendship isn't about what you own, or what you can buy. It's about being there for others when they don't need you, and even more when you do. It's about being able to laugh together, and being able to be yourself, and not have to hide your true colors. It's about appreciating the people in your life, for what they bring to your life, and how they enrich it. It's about knowing that your friends will be there at 3 am when your feeling sad and lonely. It's about being able to call somebody last minute because you're in a pinch and need somebody to watch your kids, and they do it second nature without even thinking about it. Friendship is so much more than social class. It's hard for me to understand why some people feel that need to categorize people in that way. Sometimes the best friends you can have are the ones in low places like me....